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Kink 101: Why can't more People Experience BDSM Zen?

In doing research for my last post about BDSM and Depression, I found something that I thought was interesting and I thought I would talk about, it's called transient hypofrontality. It's also know in the Kink Community as Sub-Space for submissives and Flow for Dom(me)s. I would also like to talk about why so few seem to be able to reach BDSM Zen.

 

Sub-Space is an altered state of consciousness, where you feel floaty, Euphoric, and generally outside of yourself. This state is called Transient Hypofrontality which seems to be activated in the prefrontal cortex which is segmented into two parts, the ventromedial(VM) and dorsolateral (DL) aspects. 

 

Sub-Space is generally reached during intense play during a scene, for example a scene with heavy impact play, or sensory deprivation. Generally speaking Subspace happens when your sensory input is overwhelmed with what has happened, or is happening to you in that moment. Generally speaking Subspace happens when you are either sensory deprived, during intense types of play, like impact play for example. It can even happen when you're just in the moment and you let yourself go in that moment. In order for Subspace to happen, you really have to surrender yourself to the moment. If you're distracted, or if you're thinking about anything else, it's not going to happen.

 

Subspace can be elusive for most people. Because we are so inclined to multitask and to be thinking about the next thing we have to be doing after we get done with the thing we are currently doing. The Majority of people have forgotten what it's like to just disconnect and to let yourself be in the moment. It's a problem for those of us in Kink, because we bring our daily lives into our play and we don't even realize it. It's becoming a lost art, being able to lose yourself in a moment. 

 

We are so connected to our smartphones, laptops, and other devices that we have lost an important skill. In order for more of us to experience this state of euphoria, we are going to have to learn how to disconnect, to unplug, and to surrender to the moment. Whether you're a submissive, or a Dom(me), or Top, or a bottom, we are all trying to fight for control instead of just letting things happen. 

 

I know that a lot of people are going to disagree, and that's great, because it means that the community will be talking about it. Which is important because it's a discussion that the community needs to be having right now. Because if we don't take time to examine, to have some retrospection, then the community as a whole is going to suffer, and become a shallow shell of itself.

 

The BDSM/Kink Community is a deep and rich gathering of people from all walks of life. It's one of the things that makes it such a great community to be a member of, however one of it's flaws is that there isn't a lot deep thought and discussion happening as of late. At least none that I've seen recently. 

 

Technology is a great think and it's helped to build a much stronger community, to help bring us out of the dark ages and into more mainstream acceptance up to a point. However, the same technology that has brought us together is the same one that could create a community that is disconnected from itself.

 

Because we will hide behind a screen, instead of going out to munches, and play parties, and other community events. I can't tell you how many times I've seen what would have been a great scene blown up because the submissive or the top was distracted by something else that was going on, either on their phone, or in their head. 

 

When a submissive can't get out of their head. Then they will never get to a point where they can reach subspace. If a Dom(me) can't get out of their head then they won't reach Flow, which is like subspace but it's different in that the creativity of the Top/Dom, is like a river and it flows out of them to their submissive.

 

Watching a Dom(me) fall into flow, and then seeing a sub reach subspace at the same time is just a beautiful thing behold. However it doesn't happen that often because either one or the other can't get out of their head and just surrender to the moment. Because they're either worried about that text message they just got, or a facebook post reply, or any number of other things that keep them from reaching a BSDM state of Zen. Once we can surrender to the moment then more people will be able to reach the BDSM state of Zen. 

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